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day one hundred seventy-two

i have never been good at traditional math. i liken math to a foreign language that i will never understand. i remember one specific incident when i was in grade three and we'd been given a math test. i had no idea what to do, so i thought the teacher would appreciate a lovely pencil drawing on the page instead of some badly-done long division. i drew a robot out of geometric shapes, you know, all art-with-an-ode-to-math style. i put a lot of effort into the drawing. as it turns out, my teacher didn't appreciate it at all and i was reprimanded. this didn't exactly endear me any further to math.

but when it comes to my own version of math, i excel. for example, i can translate my day today into math and come out with the right answer:

1 morning stomachache + 1/2 cup of coffee + 2 pieces of raisin toast + 1 peed-on dress + 1 long day + 1 summer solstice party + 2 plates of food + lots of happy kids + 1 tired kid 1 1/2 hours late to bed - not much night left = 1 very tired me.

see? i can even do fractions. but maybe you'd rather i just draw you a picture instead.

*****

today's look while contemplating implications derived from the effects of quantum physics:

jeans: value village, a year old ($20)
brown sandals: aldo, about four years old (about $80)

grand total:
about $100.08

1 comments:

sngz said...

Not to be an ass, but I can totally outdo that. My incident, oddly enough, also happened in third grade.

I was so positive I had finally gotten the hang of some mathematical function (I think division) that I volunteered to answer a question in class. I was wrong, got upset, and knocked over my desk and started crying.